There are people that you will never win with, no matter what you do.
I call them “The Impossibles.” The ones that always leave you feeling bad about yourself. I have known many. Often members of our own family, they are both the ones that we must avoid, and the ones that are the most difficult to avoid.
If we continue to make an effort to connect, we are left feeling terrible
If we disconnect altogether, we are left feeling guilty, selfish, perhaps responsible for their isolation.
Often we blame ourselves for the state of the relationship, even though we rationally know that we
would have remained heartfully connected with them if they had been respectful.
We would have found a way, if there was a way. We just would have. What gets lost in the shame shuffle is the fact that some people are truly impossible.
Not just difficult, not just requiring healthy boundaries, but impossible to maintain a healthy rapport with. And their impossibility is not lodged in our actions, or choices, or behaviors.
It is not a consequence of our imperfections, decisions, or
missteps. It is lodged in their own issues and limitations. It is lodged in where they are at.
They are simply IMPOSSIBLE.
And the sooner we face that, the sooner we can live a life of unlimited possibility.